DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no album ever coming out. Papa says, ‘If you see it in THE SUN it’s so.’ Please tell me the truth; is there ever going to be a new TFPP album?
115 WEST NINETY-FIFTH STREET.
VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men’s or children’s, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.
Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a new album from TFPP coming out. It exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no actual album! It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.
Not believe that we actually made the album??! You might as well not believe in teeth!!! You might get your papa to hire men to watch all the record stores on Tuesday (or is it friday now?) to catch TFPP in the “act of release”, but even if they did not see the album ever what would that prove? Nobody has heard the album yet, but that is no sign that there is no album at all. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can hear. Did you ever see golf fanatics messing up your front lawn? Of course not, but that’s no proof that golf does not exist. Nobody can conceive or bear children unless they are a female that has been impregnated.
You may tear apart the baby’s soul and see what makes the soul so important to the God and the Devil, but there is a free magic veil covering the baby which not the strongest charter mage, nor even the united strength of all the strongest metal bands that ever lived, could tear apart. Only bureaucracy, paperwork, legal proceedings, lobbying, can push aside that special curtain and view the supernal beauty and glory hole beyond. Is this making sense? Am I being clear? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else that is better than an ice cold beer on a sunny saturday afternoon.
A new TFPP album! Thank God! We have been working on it for literally forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, we will continue to be working on it probably. Enjoy your childhood while it lasts.